A Pensive Emotional Inventory of Dark Skies

Pensive

Will it end?
Will it ever end
My friend?
The fear, instability
The negativity
Does it ever end?


Emotional Inventory

Here we are in the dark corners, the recesses of my mind
Step back, take a look, what then shall we find?
Mystery
Intrigue, eccentricity
Divine
Shall these remain 'til the end of time?


Dark Skies

A storm rages within
Tinted
Clouds in shades of gray
Loom overhead yet again
I do not welcome them in
Fear is brewing
Instability consumes me
Will it ever end?


Pensive Revisited

When will it end?
Will it ever end my friend?
The chaos, instability
Most of all the negativity
Does it ever end?


Return of the Dark Sky

Upon returning to the dark corners of my mind
Again, I stepped back took
Another look
But what truly did I find?

Was it worth the toll
To regress once more
Was it a mere waste of time?
Futile, without reason or rhyme

Herein lies the answer to this
Mystery
Will it soon be revealed to me?
Has eccentricity
Lead me
To utter misery?

Emotion defined
Equals character divine
Revisited the umpteenth time
Shall I forever find
Misplaced intrigue on the edge of my mind?


Copyright 2003-2008. Annie C.

Introspection Revisited

The palpabilty
Of loneliness dwelling within me
Envelops, overtakes me
To places I dare not be

Seeming so
Not coming to know
Not shaking this
Continuous presence
Of nagging loneliness
As I walk this earth
Yearn for a sense of worth
To be, to have, now, today!

Is it here to stay?
It has yet to go away
Loneliness in my heart
Haunts me
Taunts me
Mocking the best
While the rest
Dissolves to the ground
Ceases to fly

The intensity
Of this
Loneliness
Living inside me
Filling, killing me
Shakes me
Breaks me
Takes me
To a space
Id rather not be

Seeming so
Now coming to know
Not shaking this
Continuous presence
Of staggering loneliness
Nagging, badgering
Breaking
Taking me
On an unfounded journey
An unfolding path
Unmolding, unmaking me
Tearing me apart
Into someone I dare not
Do not
Know
Or care to be
Can this be?

Ive an endless
Feeling of loneliness
In me
Longing
To be taken away
Yet it stays
And stays
For days
Sometimes

At times
I find
My mind
Blank, eyes blind
To pain
The same
Feeling I've known
Old
As the year I was born
Permeating
Invading
Overtaking
My soul

'T would be
Absolutely
Lovely
If my lonely
Only
Self would leave me alone today!
Each and everyday
In each and every way
Finally rid me of this pain
Lend me the chance to create a new way
Live a new day
Right now, today!

But then
Again
I ask myself within
When o when
Will it ever go away?
I pray
I say
Away!
Away!

Again
Again
Asking within
When o when
Shall it cease to exist?
Shall I forever experience this?


Copyright 2008. Annie C.

Begin the Beguine from the Beginning

Hello world!

I am about to embark on an exciting journey... the adventures of blogging. This is quite a new experience for me- one I've never attempted before. By suggestion of my youngest brother, I was challenged to take upon this task. It is one I have eagerly decided to pursue. As my brother spoke- he told me the many reasons why blogging could be such a good idea. For one, it can be a catalyst to adding focus to my life. In the same conversation, he also explained the benefits and rewards of how blogging could be very helpful in leading me to my destiny.

Here is a list of the most important reasons for me to start and maintain a blog. Number one, to become disciplined and motivated enough to pursue my dreams and aspirations. Two, to inspire others to do the same. Three, to give and receive feedback and encouragement for and from others. Four, to network with artists in the same field as I. Five, to acquaint myself with individuals having similar needs.

Lets return to the original topic of my blog. This is a story of a girl who's has led a strange yet interesting life. Shes experienced most everything imaginable yet all that is unbelievable. Its a blog about the daily happenings of my life from today and beyond. In this public journal I will describe every detail of my thoughts and experiences.

In my minds eye, I see you being intrigued, surprised or even shocked by my circumstances and the way in which they occur. These situations wont be your 'normal' everyday dull news report. Nor shall it be a gossip column. It is about all the raw and gritty happenings of my life. The words you are about to read may move you to tears. Or you may experience laughter, curiosity or introspection. It is subject to interpretation. Some readers will have their own views, coming to their own conclusions regarding my life experiences. This is to be expected since all people see things from different perspectives.

Now what shall I say? Need I say more? I think not. Let us move on to the next phase of our story. I must ask you this one question? Where should I begin? Have you an answer? I believe the beginning is the best place to start! Your reply? By all means yes!

This is where I shall stop for today. I will return to our discussion sooner than you think. By the time you have read this first post, you'll be left wanting more. Try not to let curiosity get the best of your imagination. I have a sneaking suspicion you will be waiting patiently for my next entry. Until then, I will be formulating my ideas of topics on which I shall focus. In a couple of days I expect to have more than enough subject matter to write about. Next time, expect a tickling of your fancy. Are you ready? Prepare yourself. Get ready because here I come!!!


Annie C.